songfic

[starlightsaoirse]

i've been packing this around on my desktop for weeks, hoping to write more. i had the idea that i would be able to trace the story through the whole song, and i even had images for the rest of it. however, i don't think that's happening, so here it is, as it is. maybe i'll come back to it, but for now, here it is.

Stay,
or, if things had worked out differently

I've been sitting here staring at the clock on the wall
And I've been laying here praying, praying she won't call
It's just another call from home
And you'll get it and be gone
And I'll be crying

And I'll be begging you, baby
Beg you not to leave
But I'll be left here waiting
With my Heart on my sleeve
Oh, for the next time we'll be here
Seems like a million years
And I think I'm dying

Beside her, she could feel Nix’s deep, even breathing and knew he was asleep. Sleep did not come so easily for her, tonight. Feeling uncomfortably exposed, it took willpower not to get out of her bed and dress. Instead, she lay still, not wanting to move and wake him, and much too tense to sleep.

Every night that Nix spent with her, lately, was like this. They came back to her room after their daily routines. They made love. Nix cuddled her in her too-small bed until he fell asleep. And she lay there, staring at the ceiling, until she either fell into an unsettled sleep, or the inevitable happened.

Tonight, she felt the vibrations from Nix’s phone before it roused him. Closing her eyes, she turned on her side, facing the wall. Finally, Nix stirred.

“Hm? Oh, hi, love. No, ‘m sorry, I-I fell asleep at Shay’s. Right. I’ll come home now, then.” A pause. “You, too.”

Try as she might, Shaylee could not ease the knot of tension between her shoulders. Nix didn’t seem to notice. His hand trailed gently across her hip as he pressed a soft kiss to her hair. And then he was gone. She told herself, sternly, that this time, she wouldn’t cry.

That was a lie, too.